Why Imposter Syndrome isn't just in your head
Why imposter syndrome isn’t just in your head
I’ve heard people say ‘Imposter syndrome is just in your head’, but it’s not.
Imposter syndrome comes from deep rooted expectations within society. It comes from generations of ‘this is how it is’ attitudes, which no longer fit the narrative of a world where women have options and opportunities.
It sits in the subconscious of generations before us, for whom a woman’s place was ‘in the kitchen’ and the man of the house was the breadwinner.
Consciously, many of us walk and talk differently now; it’s become normal for women to go to university, work in corporate settings and start their own businesses. But this is still relatively new in reality. For thousands of years, we’ve been the home maker, the child rearer and the direction taker.
It was only in 1967 that men tried to stop Kathrine Switzer running the Boston marathon because the marathon ‘wasn’t for women’. That was less than 60 years ago and there are people who are still in our day to day lives who will remember that happening. Just take a moment to think about how recent that was.
So although on the surface, many attitudes and perspectives are changing, deep down in our subconscious we’re very aware of a huge shift that’s happened for women. Old fashioned perspectives don’t just disappear, they take generations of women to prove them wrong, and our nervous system is aware of this.
The subconscious notices this in the wording people use, the facial expressions, the body language and the subtle tension in the air when somebody wasn’t expecting a the pilot to be a woman, or when they say ‘female athlete’ for a woman, but don’t throw the ‘male’ in front of the word ‘athlete’ for a man. The ‘jokes’ and comparisons that the older generation make about what happened back in their day, and how times were ‘simpler’ back then. The world is changing, but we’re not there yet and our senses are aware of it.
But here’s what we can do about it…
We can become self-aware.
The world certainly isn’t giving away opportunities for women to rise, we still have to fight for them, so if you’re in a position of power, leadership or knowledge, in any way, shape or form, I want you to stop for a minute and think ‘could my grandmother have done this?’. And I don’t mean did she have the grit and determination, I mean did she have the option? Was it even within her realm of possibility as a woman to be doing what you’re doing now?
If the answer to this is no, I can guarantee that you have EARNED your position. You have put in the hours to learn, put in the time to develop and practice skills, put in the effort to become known as a candidate, and then competed with others to get the spot, because there are a thousand other women out there who are fighting for what you’ve got and haven’t achieved it yet. There are women out there who would love to know your secret, have your energy, determination or confidence. You have been selected, whether that’s by employers, clients, or the people around you to be the person in your position, from a wealth of talented women out there who are fighting for the same thing.
If you’re feeling Imposter syndrome, the likelihood is that your subconscious is the one that feels uneasy. It’s not that you don’t deserve to be where you are, it’s that society is so hard wired from thousands of years that the position you are in is one ‘for a man’, that something just feels ‘off’, and so we put this down to us.
But it’s not us, it’s history, and we’re here to change that. Because in the world we’re creating, permission is not required.
Project: Unapologetic
We’re building an unrivalled community of strong, ambitious women who want to unapologetically live to their own definition of success.
This is for you if:
You’re ambitious, driven, and done with feeling like you have something to prove
You have that niggling ‘I’m going to get found out’ voice in the back of your head
You’re ready for the world to change how it sees women
You don’t need to have it all figured out, we’ll do that together
